


Love the One You're With

by Carpedmv



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, F/M, Happy (ish) ending, Jealous Sam, Oblivious Moose, Pegging
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-26 12:28:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7574077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carpedmv/pseuds/Carpedmv
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I had an odd dream where I was kept by Djinn and rescued by the Winchesters. And then another odd dream where Dean was pining for Cas and I was pining for Sam and we decided to help each other deal with the pain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love the One You're With

You first met Dean and Sam Winchester when they saved you from a nest of Djinn keeping you as an experiment, trying to see how long it took before they drove you insane or consumed you completely. You were the only survivor and something about you awoke the nurturing gene in the Winchester brothers. There was no way they were going to let you go out into the real world alone, Sam had argued. Dean agreed, wanting to make sure you felt safe. You'll stay at the bunker until you’re ready to rejoin the real world, whenever that might be. 

You fit into their dynamic so well, it was like you had always been there. Sam discovered your love of mythology and your desperate need to catalog the library. Dean found out that you loved action movies, old cars, and all kinds of music. You fell into a rhythm while you were there: Get up, research, bake a pie once in awhile (you had even convinced Dean to try quiche Lorraine, and, while he claimed real pie didn't have rabbit food in it, he still ate three servings), argued with Crowley when there was a need (and had secret Buffy the Vampire Slayer marathons with him that Dean and Sam knew nothing about), discussed poetry and literature with Cas who was still learning about the information Metatron had given him, and even found time to learn how to defend yourself. Dean began talking about taking you on a hunt, just to get your feet wet. 

Now, seven months after they first found you, you were done with the nightmares and were finding a place for yourself in this fucked up world. You were even something you had thought was no longer possible, happy. There was still something missing but you had your boys, you had the bunker, and you were beginning to make a life.

It's a slow Saturday night and you can tell Dean is frustrated and itchy. It might be because Cas is off doing something for his father but you don’t bring it up. You’ve learned that Dean gets touchy if you try to discuss Cas and feelings in the same sentence. You are sprawled on the couch next to Dean, your feet resting on his lap, trying to convince him he owes you a foot rub. Sam had left the day before, out to check on leads for a possible “kiddy” hunt, as Dean called it, something simple you could use to show off your new found skills. 

You are watching a movie recently released on cable and aren’t sure on the plot, something about the fate of the world resting in the hands of the lead characters, two dumb asses that hate each other. Except, of course, when they don't. There is a misunderstanding between the main characters. Dean laughs as the male lead says something utterly stupid and the female hauls off and punches him. 

“Bet that would make your life easier,” he jokes, nudging you. 

You smirk back. “What? Punching my way out of trouble? Definitely.” The smile leaves both your faces when you realize that this simple punch set off the leads and they are suddenly grappling with each other, trying to get naked and commence sexy business instead of saving the world. “Or maybe into trouble. Wow. Well.”

“Yeah,” Dean comments. “Well.” Your witty commentary is at an end while you both stare dumbfounded at the screen.

“Oh, fuck it,” you say. “I am so going to regret this.” Dean turns to you, a puzzled look on that sweet, handsome face. You raise your fist and lightly thump him on the chest.

He looks at you and then at the slightly balled up fist you have planted on him. “What are you doing, Y/N?” he asks slowly.

“Uh, looking for trouble?” you say, staring into his green eyes and nodding yes to his unasked question. He reaches down, taking your hand in his and tugging gently. You take it as your cue to lean over and then, yes, thanks be to Chuck, he's finally kissing you.

He's all teeth and tongue, rough and gentle at the same time. You throw your head back when he begins to kiss his way down your neck, checking to make sure you're still in the moment. “Dean,” you pant his name as he sucks lightly on your shoulder, shoving your tank top out of the way. 

“Are you sure about this, Y/N?” he asks. 

“Oh, god, Dean,” you moan into his mouth. He pulls back, staring at you while you watch the emotions play out over his face. You wordlessly stand up and pull him towards your bedroom. Once inside your room, you push him up against the door and begin to ravish his mouth. It's not long before he's visibly shaking with emotion. 

You pull away and smile at him. It is a wicked smile, one born out of lust and love for this man you adore. “What?” 

You walk towards him, your smile deepening as you see him staring back with the same awe and lust. “Do you trust me, Dean?” you ask.

He shrugs out of his shirt quickly and nods. “Yeah,” he says seriously. “I do.”

“Okay.” You stare at him, wondering how he will react to your next move. Will he reject you or would he, could he possibly relax enough to let it happen? “Who do you need tonight, Dean? Who do you want me to be?”

You stand there, your heart in your eyes as you tell him silently you know how he feels, you understand it, and want more than anything to help him deal with the unrequited love. And he knows you understand because he can see the same unrequited love in your eyes. He pulls you into a tight embrace and sobs a name into your shoulder.

“Cas. Oh God, please, Cas.” 

“Okay. Then that’s who I am.” You kiss him tenderly on the lips and maneuver him to your dresser. Reaching into the top drawer, you feel around for what you need. You remember the look on his face when he dropped the package on your lap last week, a single raised eyebrow the only clue he knew perfectly well that you were buying sex toys off the Internet. You had blushed and smiled defiantly at him, thankful that Sam hadn’t been around. “Discreet packaging, my ass,” you had muttered, glaring at the prominent label. 

Now he finally got to see what you had been keeping a secret. The pink dildo was only six inches long but you knew that what was making his eyes widen were the leather straps and silver snaps you’d use to fasten it around your body. You also hold a bottle of lube. “I took a guess.”

“You bought me a strap-on?" You nod. "How? Why? Am I that transparent?” 

You chuckle softly. “No. Not transparent. I think I’m the only one that knows. You’re just so obviously, irrevocably in love with him. And I guess, well, since I know what that’s like, that maybe I could help you out. It’s not exactly what either of us need but hell, if you can’t be with the one you love…”

He finishes the sentence for you. “Love the one you’re with. Yeah. You’re right. If you’re sure you want to do this, I would love to have you love me tonight, Y/N. And I want to love you right back.”

Slowly you undress each other. You step into the straps and suddenly, you’re the proud owner of a hard pink dick. The tension in the room is palpable and you know there’s only one resolution here.

Your eyes devour him, looking at him differently. Earlier today, he was your brother, your best friend. Now he is something to be treasured, to be taken apart and put back together again. “Hello, Dean,” you say in your best imitation of Cas’s deep voice.

He closes his eyes in relief. “Oh, Cas, I need this so much.”

“I know. I’m going to take care of you tonight.” You step forward, slowly backing him up against the bed. His knees buckle when he gets to the edge and he sits down, leaning forward and resting his head against your stomach. “I need you to show me how much you want me, Dean,” you rasp, pushing your dick towards him.

He sobs and with one quick move, he has grabbed you by the ass and pulled you forward. The dildo is in his mouth suddenly and he is licking and sucking like there is no tomorrow. For all you know, there may not be one. The obscene slurping is doing things to you, making you wish that you could actually feel his mouth taking you in. He is crying softly and muttering and you realize he’s not talking to himself, he’s talking to Cas.

“I love you so much, Cas,” he says, his mouth stretched around you. “I need you to touch me, show me what it’s like to fly. Hold me like you did when you flew me out of hell.”

You pull back softly, moved to tears. The love he feels for his angel is so beautiful, you wish Cas was there to hear him, see him so vulnerable. Although, you realize, Cas may not appreciate the situation as much as you do. You drop a quick kiss on his head and whisper roughly in his ear “I want you on your hands and knees for me, baby. I’m going to take care of you, Dean. Fly you out of hell and into Heaven.” You have no idea where the words are coming from but imagine that they are true. That this is what Cas wants to say. And it's what Dean needs to hear.

Dean can't stop talking. “God, I need you so badly, Cas. I’ve loved you for so long. I think of you all the time. Want to hold you and kiss you and tell you no one has ever meant this much to me.” You silence him with a kiss and help him turn over.

When he’s finally in place, you admire him. There’s just enough light for you to see the sharp planes of his shoulders, the soft curve of his ass. You run your hand through his hair, tugging lightly, and smile as he whimpers. You press kisses down his spine, nipping at his skin and then soothing the sting of the bites with your tongue. When you finally reach your destination, he is shivering with need and want. 

You slowly pop the cap and lube up your hand. You want this to be good for him, want to hear him scream out Cas’s name while you wreck him. While you’ve never done this before, you’ve learned that the Internet is a wild and wicked place and there’s plenty of advice out there for women wanting to bend over their best guy friend for the first time. 

Your hand is dripping with lube and you gently begin to circle his hole. At your first touch, he jumps and then settles back down as you stroke his back, gentling him with whispered words of love. “I love you,” you tell him. “I’ve loved you since I first laid hands on you in hell. I’ve never stopped loving you.”

One finger has been pressing into him slowly and you decide to try for another. The moans you receive are gratifying. After a few minutes of gently stroking him from the inside, you scissor your fingers and he screams. 

“One more finger,” you gasp into his ear. He is mindless, trying to push himself back onto your fingers. The third one is inside him and you are marveling over how tight he is, how greedy his ass is for you. 

Finally, you think he’s been prepped enough. You pull out your fingers, chuckling at the slight moan he makes as you leave him and then you press up to his back. You slowly line up, centering your dick with his entrance and then wait. You sigh as you feel him push back against you, impaling himself. Once you’ve bottomed out, you give into the instinct and begin thrusting. Soft, gentle thrusts at first but then you become rougher. 

Once you reach a rhythm, you begin talking again. “Do you love my cock inside of you, Dean?” you ask him. He whines wordlessly at you, desperation making him pull at your hips, trying to get more of you inside of him. You know he is close to the edge and reach around, taking him into hand. You begin to jerk him off while he cries out Cas’s name. “I’m here, Dean,” you tell him. “I’m always with you. I love you like this, all desperate for me, letting me finally touch you the way I’ve wanted for years. Next time, I want you to take me, slam yourself inside of me and make me see the stars.” 

With a final thrust and scream, Dean explodes in your hand. He is sobbing “Cas, Cas, oh god, Cas” over and over again. You gently pull out of him and rock him back and forth, holding onto him while he cries. Finally, when the tears have stopped, you divest yourself of the strap-on and drop it off the side of the bed. He grabs onto you tightly and covers your face with kisses. “Thank you,” he says finally.

“My pleasure,” you tell him, laughing slightly at your phrasing. 

He looks at you sharply. “Did you?” You shake your head. It wasn’t about that for you. It was about making him happy and relaxed and feeling loved for once. “Oh. Oh, no, that won’t do.” He leans into you and kisses you deeply. Then he pulls back and asks “Do you trust me?”

You smile. “Yes. With my life.”

“Who do you need tonight, Y/N? Who do you want me to be?” Hearing him repeat your question makes you tear up and you shake your head. “No. I’m serious.” He repeats the question, a kiss punctuating each word. “Who am I tonight?”

Finally, you can’t hold back any longer. You sigh “Sam” and pull him close to you. The eyes are the wrong color, his hair is too short, but for a brief moment, another face is superimposed over his. “God, Sam, I love you so much.”

“I know,” he says, smoothing a hand over your hair. “I love you too. I have since you first looked me in the eyes and said ‘Djinn? Like Aladdin or Barbara Eden?’”

You laugh, remembering that first conversation after you woke up in a strange bed, your fascination with the gentle stranger softly washing the dirt and blood off of your face. How he had held you when you cried as he explained what had happened. How he encouraged you to heal, to get out of bed and start walking with him, living again. How he made you eat healthy and jog and now, some mornings, you can even beat him when the two of you go for a run. If you trip him first.

“I’m going to take care of you now,” Dean tells you. “Close your eyes. Let me love the one I’m with.”

You close your eyes and listen to Dean, no, Sam, tell you how beautiful you are. How your smile makes him happy and how he’s wanted to touch you for so long but was afraid you would reject him. His words are sometimes muffled when he is teasing you with his tongue but you can feel them on your skin. He alternates between your breasts, nipping and pulling and you can feel your arousal wash over you. 

“I love you, Y/N,” he says. “I love the way you look when you are in research mode. When you dance around the bunker to music only you can hear. How you think you’re keeping the Buffy marathons with Crowley a secret.” Your eyes fly open at that. He laughs down at you. “Please. Like I can’t hear you two arguing over who's hotter, Spike or Angel.” He kisses your eyes shut again. “How you got Dean to eat quiche Lorraine. You fed my carnivore brother spinach and lived to tell about it.”

He kisses his way down your stomach, telling you how he loves the way you taste and smell. He slowly eases your legs apart and then, while you scream out Sam’s name, he uses his tongue to pour out all the love he can into your center. He devours you with tongue and teeth and fingers until you are shaking and sobbing from your orgasm.

When it is over, it's his turn to hold you as you cry. Then he pushes you back down and takes you even higher this time. You scream one last time, a final burst that is almost like a song. 

You open your eyes and stare up at Dean. He is smiling down at you smugly. “I win.”

“What?! What do you mean, you win?”

He smirks. “I believe you had two orgasms to my one. So that means you go get us a couple of beers.” You grumble to yourself but it is true, he did provide you with the bonus orgasm. 

You pull on a new tank and a pair of pajama bottoms. “Fine,” you tell him. “I’ll be right back.” He leans back in the bed, already drifting off to sleep.

“Dean?” He opens his eyes and looks at you. “Thanks. I…” You have no idea what you want to tell him but somehow he knows. 

“Yeah. You too. Thank you.” You both stare at each other for a moment, realizing that by tomorrow morning, you will never speak of this again. That it was a one time thing, allowing you both the opportunity to be with the one you loved, even if it was only by proxy.

You reach into the refrigerator, thinking about how well you’re going to sleep tonight, and grab the requested beers. It isn’t until you turn around that you realize you’re not alone.

“How long has this been going on?” Sam asks you.

You almost drop the beers and gasp, embarrassed as hell that he was able to sneak up on you. “Jesus, Sam, a little warning next time, okay?!”

“I asked you a question,” Sam says harshly. “How long?” 

You stare at him blankly. “What?”

“Oh, don't give me that. How long have you been fucking my brother?”

You stare at him, shocked. “Oh, God. You heard?” 

He glares at you, his face stern. “Yeah,” he snorts. “It was a little obvious. You’ve got quite the vocal range, Y/N.” He pushes his way past you and grabs a beer for himself. “So. You and Dean. Are fucking.”

“Um. Well, um, yeah, I guess you could say that.”

“What else am I supposed to call it? Is it love? Are you in love with my brother? Is he in love with you?” He stares at you. Why is he so angry, you wonder.

“It just happened tonight, Sam,” you tell him. “And yes, I love him but I’m not in love with him. And he’s not in love with me. Let me go bring this to Dean and then we can talk.” You gesture with the beer and hurry into the hallway.

God, why did he have to hear you? What did he hear? It couldn’t have been that much if he was asking if you were in love with Dean. He wouldn’t ask that if he had heard you screaming out his name. You burst into your bedroom, wide eyed and panicked. Dean jumps out of bed, ready to do battle.

“What? What is it, Y/N?” he asks. 

“Sam’s home,” you choke out. “And he heard us.” You shove the beers into Dean’s hands and run back out of the room, ignoring Dean’s curses.

Sam is no longer in the kitchen. You search for him, finally finding him in the library. He’s sitting at a table, a lonely lamp turned on. You sit down across from him and stare, trying to figure out what to say to make everything go back to normal. You’d rather deal with a thousand years of painful unrequited love than this awkwardness.

“So. You’re not in love with each other.” he says finally.

“No. We’re not in love with each other,” you repeat. “Dean’s, um, well, he, I mean...you see, it’s well,” You have absolutely no idea what to say. You can’t give away Dean’s secret.

And then you don’t have to because you hear it being spoken from the doorway. “Dean’s in love with Cas. And Y/N’s in love with you.” Dean is standing there, looking at Sam. The honesty in his eyes is beautiful, if not completely and totally embarrassing.

“Dude!” You cry out. “Not cool!” You turn bright red and hope the floor will open up and swallow you whole. 

Sam looks stunned. “What?!”

Dean sighs. “Clean out your ears, Sammy. I said I'm in love with Cas.”

“Well, duh, Dean, I’ve known that for years. And don’t call me Sammy.” 

“Does everyone know?” Dean yells at the ceiling. “What the hell!”

Sam stares at you. You try to look away, still embarrassed. “You’re in love with me,” he says softly, wondrously. And then you’re no longer embarrassed because finally he knows, finally you can tell him how you feel.

“Sam, I love you,” you say. Smiling, you say it again. “I love you. I have since I first opened my eyes and you were cleaning my face. I’ve loved you since you made me soup.”

He laughs quietly, “Yeah, that’s how I get all the ladies, my mad soup making skills.” 

You continue. “You are the most gentle, loving person I’ve ever met,” you tell him, tears in your eyes as you finally unburden your soul. “How could I not be in love with you? You’re so smart and brilliant and you make me laugh at myself and the world finally makes sense because you’re in it. You…” You stop, afraid to continue.

Dean is suddenly there, his hands on your shoulders. “Tell him,” he says. “Tell him everything.” He kisses you on the forehead and turns to walk away.

You stand quickly and hug him before he can get too far. “Everything?” you whisper?

“Well, maybe not everything,” Dean whispers back. “I deserve some secrets.” He hugs you one last time. “Love you, sis,” he says and then he's gone.

Sam is staring at you, the smile on his face wide and bright. “You love me.” He is ecstatic and picks you up, actually spinning you in a circle. 

“Oh my god,” you think. “I’m in my own sappy love story.” You giggle at him. “Yes,” you say out loud. “I love you. I’ve been walking around with a huge sign on my forehead that said ‘Secretly in love with oblivious Moose!’”

“Hey! No Moose cracks!” And then finally, finally, after way too long, he is kissing you. Gently. Reverently. Lovingly. And you are kissing him back. After all this time, you have finally found your place in this weird, messed up world.

You whisper a quick prayer before kissing Sam again. Just a thought that someday, Dean could be this happy, Dean would know what it felt like to be whole and loved by his angel.

“Are you hungry?” Sam asks, smiling down at you. “I’m in the mood for soup.” 

As he pulls you back to the kitchen, as you laugh up at him, you don’t see the angel. The angel that’s been there since the first prayer fell from Dean’s lips tonight. Who had wanted nothing more than to go to Dean and tell him everything you said as his proxy was true. That he had loved Dean since he flew him out of hell and would love him until it was time to take him to Heaven. But, because the world was still fucked up, he couldn’t say any of it.

**Author's Note:**

> I have never tried to write a reader fiction before but the dream about being held by the Djinn was terrifying and needed to be purged from my system. So I wrote some smutty smut to make it all better.
> 
> The song "Love the One You're With" is a favorite of mine. The harmony and vocals and the soft angst that's just pouring out. I like to imagine that the song's not about cheating but two people dealing with unrequited love and taking comfort where they can.
> 
> If you're down and confused  
> And you can't remember who you're talkin' to  
> Concentration slips away  
> 'Cuz your baby is so far away
> 
> Well there's a rose in a fisted glove  
> And the eagle flies with the dove  
> And if you can't be with the one you love  
> Honey love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with
> 
> Don't be angry, don't be sad  
> Don't sit cryin' of about the good times you had  
> There's a girl right next to you  
> And she's just waiting for something to do
> 
> There's a rose in a fisted glove  
> And the eagle flies with the dove  
> And if you can't be with the one you love  
> Honey love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with
> 
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with
> 
> Turn your heartaches run into joy  
> She's a girl and you're a boy  
> Get it together, make it nice  
> Ain't gonna need anymore advice
> 
> There's a rose in a fisted glove  
> And the eagle flies with the dove  
> And if you can't be with the one you love  
> Honey love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with  
> Love the one you're with
> 
> Also, just in case there's any question, the answer is Spike. Crowley may prefer Angel but he's just weird that way.


End file.
